Last Supper Is Full Of Lies – I Was Right Not To Pay Attention In CCD

junkyardarts April 20, 2011 Comments Off on Last Supper Is Full Of Lies – I Was Right Not To Pay Attention In CCD

dogs last supper from picture itIt’s all lies!

Well.  Sort of.  Though in the age of Dan Brown’s monstrous interpretations of iconic Catholic artworks, where astrologers are taken seriously and fuck up my zodiac sign sending me into an existential crisis over whether I truly am a Gemini and what does it mean if I’m not anymore?! I should not be surprised to hear that, oh jeez, Easter might not actually be on Easter because, well, Jesus ate dinner earlier in the week.

At least that is what Colin Humphreys, a Cambridge University scientist and professor, says about it.  Apparently the contradicting stories in the books of Luke, Matthew and Mark about Passover, the Exodus and the Last Supper aren’t a result of tales written by three different people, at three different times about three different events and they lacked a common editor – it’s really because they all used a different calendar to count the days they all presumably lived in at the same time.

See, this whole ‘thousands of years of misinterpretation’ is just our modern age mixup of these writers’ work and the old-timey watches they were wearing!  I mean, thanks to our latest technology and expert scientific research from major Universities, we now know about the Mayan’s and 2012; science is always right when you are going by the right calendar, you see.

Here’s hoping you didn’t give up anything too tough for Lent, considering it could last a few days longer than expected, and here’s to a fun day with family this weekend fraught with concern, dismay and anger that all those years spent in CCD (for all your Catholics out there) were for naught.

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